quadtails

12:37 am: Beh..long time no update. =/
Yeah...it's been a while, and I'm getting older, which is sad to say since up here *pokes cranium*, I haven't aged in the slightest. I'm still the dumb fuck cunt that you've known for years and years to come =x Oh wait..no one checks my journal anyway since it hasn't been updated in 75 weeks or so (according to LJ), =O So I'll get all personal....maybe. My art has almost not improved at all, nor has my coding capabilities. I'm 19 years of age, 6'2', 192 lbs., and I still cannot drive. My life consists of sleeping, eating, imbibing hydrates, playing Maplestory, playing with my dog and lastly, visiting my girlfriend on a nearly daily basi--WAIT WHAT?! Yep, you heard correctly. I now have another *local* girlfriend. This one is different though. Way...WAY different. Like..."Kiarri/Pashtaro" different, with the exception of the loli-voice. This one has the loli-face. From this point, let's take a look at the VERY few and minuscule positive points in my life (This one seems to be pretty big though). A girl on Gaia-Online (a site I visit occasionally) spotted a picture of myself posted within a random CB (Chatterbox) picture thread. Since Gaia has an enormous amount of users (+1,000,000), and about 10-30 threads created per minute (or less; according to my speculations) within the chatterbox forum (not including about 20-30 other separate forums), the odds of this even happening are astronomical. She PM'd me stating that she knew me from high-school a while ago (I had dropped out in November of last year, long story short; I was sick of being bullied by the admins and I was bound to fail any way SINCE I'M SO FUCKING SMART =D)

...ANYWAY, back on topic. To reiterate: A user on Gaia local to my geography randomly found me in a random, picture thread on the CB. By local, I mean she lives a 30 minute walk away from my location. Unbelievable, and I simply cannot express my thoughts to her enough. Maybe we started dating a bit too fast, but I couldn't help myself. She's a dream in reality. Everything about her is great. Her art, her IQ, her vast knowledge of cultures and languages, and common tasks in general....now my question is, what the fuck does she see in me that makes me her worth-while? I love her to death and I have plenty of reasons to do so, but why does she love me...? I'm a complete, idiotic dumbfuck compared to her. All I do is envy her, though we usually get along, it happens daily.... I wish I were as smart as her...she's become a role-model for me practically..I love her dearly. <3

I've stated all the major points that have occurred in my life in the past year or so, though of course other things have happened (that I will state later as time/my patience permits).


>_<

10:08 pm: Love cannot be bought; it must be achieved.
Over the course of my life, I learned that love can be easier than watering a plant, or more difficult than passing those finals. This time, I believe life finally set me in the right direction: The girl of my dreams. To some, she may appear as the typical looking teenage female, to others, she may appear as a filthy slut. Well, in my case, she's neither. To me, this female woman touched my heart from the second we said hello. Her name rang a note in my head that was of a distinguishable and precise pitch. I felt rather dismal, interacting with her with my lame roleplay lines and what-not; though in the end, she didn't seem bothered by them. The way she spoke, the way she looked, the way she thought, all attracted me (and then some). Her dialogue was of something unheard; It was the politeness of a young child, wrapped inside of a beautiful, teenage girl. Her looks were also something unexpected; a beautiful skin tone, build, and eyes greater than the beauty of a diamond....

09:37 pm: Umm...Kiarri told me to do this...
Umm...Kiarri says "hewo o-o" annnnnnnnd, she told me to update this...thingimabob. Umm..sooo...what has happened lately? Well...umm..I'm on the phone with her...and her sister keeps interrupting our conversation, annnnnnd, I'm still waiting for her sister to shut up...annnnnnnd...her dog (daisy) was licking poo water...and somebody's eyes are burning from what I hear on the headset....I'm not exactly sure what's going on, but whatever it is, I want it to stop...and Kiarri just said "IT'S SO CUTE!!!"..and now she just said "hello". She just "ummm"...and my grandma just said we're a bunch of dumba**ed rednecks.

12:05 am: Nothing much..has changed?
Hmm....what has changed in my life since my last update? Ahh, yes... Sara dumped me, D-U-M-P-E-D me. Why? Well, I believe she became sick of myself not providing transportation to and from school. Sure, I'm 17, but I know a 23 year old who still can't drive, so I shouldn't feel too alone. If you honestly think I'm crazy, psycho, hopeless, ignorant, go ahead and think that. I think the same for you. See? We agreed. But onto what's present in my life currently...




I was thrilled to find out I could make free pc-to-phone calls with Skype. Meaning, I could call anyone from Canada to the U.S., FREE. I was also excited knowing I could call pash with this, or so I hoped. We've made a few decisions, and decided that I'm just going to call her tommorow. Although I still feel down about myself, its a misery that's here to stay...

10:25 pm: What the hell did I do wrong?
What am I doing to put myself in a pessimistic mood each and every day? I follow the rules, I do my school-work, in rare-cases, I do my given chores (which are rare, as stated). To my unbelief, I made a few friends at school. And to my amazement...I came across a girl who seemed innocent, smart, cuddly, and above all, lovable...and somehow I had the guts to ask her out. She agreed, and so now..yeah..we're lovebirds..so...bleh. But back onto the subject of being miserable... I just don't understand. I made some friends, I even made a love, and I"m still as pessimistic as ever. Oh sure, I have something to be proud of, my overly-rated musical talent. With that being said, I also wonder when my common sense will be filled completely....because obviously..it's not all there yet. I still struggle with standing up straight, so you might as well give up on teaching me the whole "Self-defense" thing too (have you seen me try to throw a punch? It's the funniest thing...ever). Sometimes I wonder to life, why I was done like this, and why I'm not in starving in Africa like I should be, as miserable as I am. I'm still trying to expel stress through physical means. (I.E., cutting arm, slamming finger into drawer..anything that is painful). I want someone to talk to, someone who will listen to me, someone who will have patience with me, someone who will not give up on me, someone who will understand me, but above all, someone who will NOT forget. Negligence is a major factor as to why I'm never happy. If for just once in my life..someone would stay around me, someone I could hug, someone I could always trust and rely one, someone who would help me through the steps in life, maybe then, I could see myself at a happier stand-still.

08:11 pm:

Name:	Dusty
Birthdate:	1/24/89
Birthplace:	Pascagoula, MS
Current Location:	Pascagoula, MS
Eye Color:	Brown
Hair Color:	Reddish-brown (auburn...ugh)
Height:	6'' 1'
Weight:	165
Piercings:	None., seems like they would hurt.
Tatoos:	Are you crazy?! Those hurt!!!
Boyfriend/Girlfriend:	Kendra Wilkes o-o
Overused Phraze:	I'm bored
FAVORITES
Food:	Mmm...pizza
Candy:	t3h gummi worms
Number:	2
Color:	Orange
Animal:	Fox
Drink:	Dr. Pepper
Alcohol Drink:	o.o I dun drink
Bagel:	I dun eet o-o
Letter:	S
Body Part on Opposite sex:	Umm...I'm not disclosing that info.
This or That
Pepsi or Coke:	Coke
McDonalds or BurgerKing:	McDonaldz o.o
Strawberry or Watermelon:	Watermelon o.o
Hot tea or Ice tea:	Icy Tea ^.^
Chocolate or Vanilla	Vanilla o-o
Hot Chocolate or Coffee:	Hot chocolate o.o
Kiss or Hug:	Hug, but both if applicable ^.^
Dog or Cat:	Dog
Rap or Punk:	Hmm...not a big fan of either
Summer or Winter:	Summer
Scary Movies or Funny Movies:	Yet another tie... o.o
Love or Money:	Love, money is ebil.
YOUR...
Bedtime:	11:30 PM on school nights. Whenever on Weekends.
Most Missed Memory:	Spending time with Kyle...back in SC.
Best phyiscal feature:	Meh face? o.0;; I"ve been told x.x
First Thought Waking Up:	Usually too nervous to remember.
Goal for this year:	To find happiness.
Best Friends:	Real life: Kyle | Online: too many to list.
Weakness:	Emotional; Easily offended by name calling
Fears:	Getting made fun of, stolen from, Dad.
Heritage:
Longest relationship:	Current one now...Since September so far.
HAVE YOU...
Ever Drank:	Yes, but was forced.
Ever Smoked:	No, and hope to never.
Pot:	Nooo.
Ever been Drunk:	No.
Ever been beaten up:	Stunningly suprised, no.
Ever beaten someone up:	No. Wouldn't know how.
Ever Shoplifted:	Yes, when I was 6. Stole a light-up toy from a 2nd hand store.
Ever Skinny Dipped:	No.
Ever Kissed Opposite sex:	Once o-o
Been Dumped Lately:	No.
IN A GUY/GIRL
Favorite Eye Color:	Green
Favorite Hair Color:	Doesn't matter.
Short or Long:	Long, but really doesn't matter.
Height:	As long as she's not below 3 ft or above 7 ft, I'm good :P
Style:	Hmm..still reasearching this one.
Looks or Personality:	Erm..how to say this, still researching.
Hot or Cute	Both o-o
Drugs and Alcohol:	I'd prefer she not do this, but, it's just a preferrance.
Muscular or Really Skinny:	o-o skinnyish.
RANDOMS
Number of Regrets in the Past:	Millions.
What country do you want to Visit:	Japan
How do you want to Die:	Ooh..good question, unfortuanetly I don't have a very good answer.
Been to the Mall Lately:	No. Like I said, no friends. Pointless to do.
Do you like Thunderstorms:	If they don't affect my computer, then yes.
Get along with your Parents:	Dad, NO. Mom, YES.
Health Freak:	No way.
Do you think your Attractive:	To some extent, but not too attractive.
Believe in Yourself:	No; 0 self esteem as I type this.
Want to go to College:	Yesh.
Do you Smoke:	Nu.
Do you Drink:	Nu.
Shower Daily:	Attempt to.
Been in Love:	Yesh.
Do you Sing:	When I'm alone, yes.
Want to get Married:	Of course.
Do you want Children:	Maybe.
Have your future kids names planned out:	No.
Age you wanna lose your Virginity:	Very good question...still no good answer.
Hate anyone:	Hatrid is nonexistant if you're talking to that person.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

Current Mood: enough said.

Current Music: Silence.

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11:42 pm: A rather minor update...
More and more chaos boils in my noggin, full of anger, jealousy, and confusion. While I sit there, reading over the live-journals of others, envy-ing (is that a word?) their happy thoughts, I'd love to beat the living shit of them. I see no reason why I do not deserve happy thoughts. I do what I'm told, when I'm told. Hell, I'm excelling on my school work. And you know what? I'm still dissatisfied. I dislike it when my friends go about saying shit like "YAY I GOT A NEW GAME!!" or "AWESOME I GET TO GO TO MY FRIENDS' HOUSE!!", or who could forget "I'm gonna go see a movie so talk to you later * has just signed off*" I'd love to scream at and strangle that so-called person that tells me information of that sort. Do I ever get to see a movie? Do I ever get a new game? Do I ever get to spend time with a friend? I wonder what that's like. But all in all, the answer is, not no...but FUCK NO. Nothing makes me more envious than to hear people speak of this shit. It makes me feel unwanted, jealous (duh), worthless, confused, and just plain sad. I feel I'm never going to make it anywhere in life, because of this fucking depression of mine. That's why I'm seeking a way to, dare I say it, kill myself. Post your comments if you have any recommendations. I sense my time here is about to expire.

Current Mood: I'll fucking kill you.

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11:05 pm: Welcome to Hell; Do NOT enjoy your stay...
I've floated through space and time, in wonderance of when my parents will grow up. It seems that thought should be prohibited from my mind, as war still continues to linger between them, with little to no hope of it ending anytime soon. Hell has arisen from below, and onto the Earth's crust, where I stand, dilly-dallying while my parents conflict each nanosecond of the day. I run crying to not my friends, being that I don't have any REAL LIFE people to socialize with; but my online friends. It seems like they're safe with the "confidential information" I distribute and pass along to them. I honestly do not know if they believe me, disagree with me, or just plain don't care. Whichever the choice, it doesn't change the fact that I'm trapped in an oblivion of raging chaos. Everyone tells me to make the choice, but assuming there are 2 choices in this decision, its hellacious either way I go. One group of people is going to dislike me, or another. I can't exactly run away from the enraging flames of screaming and yelling of one another, amongst my parents. Even if I escaped to my grandma's house, my father would pull up in front of the home, demanding my presence in his territory. And if I declined his demands, he would basically act as if he disowned me. If I stayed with him, I would become worrysome and edgy. In fact, as far as I know, I currently live with him. He lives with his parents, because he is unable to keep a home. I won't go into that matter, for it's unnecessary for me to groan and moan over all those times we lost homes in the past. His parents are very uptight neat freaks. They give me flack when I ask for something as simplistic as a bottle of coke when our stock was empty. It's a chore to ask for something like that. I asked several times to spend my $40, and I get the typical "I'll take you later". Y'know what Dad? LATER NEVER COMES! I've yet to say that to him, but I have the strongest feeling he would threaten me if I did. But its essentially true, later never comes; same goes for tommorow, if he were to say "Tommorow I'll take you" Over the times where I would become directly in the middle of one of my parent's arguements, I would go about, well, cutting myself. My mom caught me once long ago, and slapped me. I was caught again a few months later, but the knife was snatched away from me. After the 3rd time I was caught, Dad declared he had to observe my every move whenever I called mom, and he also stated that I could no longer stay alone. Is life for me just Hell or what? Hence the title, "Welcome to Hell; Do NOT enjoy your stay". Things for me just continue to worsen over time. And I, myself, declare this Christmas holiday for me the WORST EVER. My ranting here, is done.

09:41 pm: w00t!

Dear Santa... Dear Santa, This year I've been busy! In November I helped tailsprower147 see the light (8 points). Last Saturday I gave shadytails a life-saving blood transfusion (50 points). In October I got in line at the supermarket at the same time as someone else and I didn't yield (-8 points). In February I turned triggur in for spitting (3 points). Last Wednesday I ate my brussel sprouts (1 points). Overall, I've been nice (54 points). For Christmas I deserve a pony! Sincerely, quadtails

Write your letter to Santa! Enter your LJ username:

05:47 pm: Lots of crap in the air
Well well what to say....Lots of BS has happened over the last..well......So I'll try to type up as much as I can...First of all, I've been forbidden to go see my grandma, and forced to live with my Dad, seeing as my parents are split up (They're not exactly divorced) I'm only able to visit my mom :( woopee, and even more BS to arouse me, a cursed hurricane comes out of nowhere and destroys everything, luckily I didn't lose anything, but then again, I'm not suprised, seeing as I've lost so much in the past, it wouldn't be right if I lost anything in the hurricane. 6 days of he** I had to endure of no electricity, and tiring yard work, weeeee what fun. Then I find out I can't return to school until OCTOBER....wthf (what the holy fu**) So I spend this period of time rethinking my outlook when I return to school, whilst talking to my online friends (I've said it once and I'll say it again, I have no real life friends, so I don't know what it's like to go out and have fun). But now that I have a Tails plushie, I feel a bit happier, I'm obsessed with Tails, and if you didn't know that, you obviously don't know me very well. Moving right along, lately I've been argueing with my online friends, through jealousy, I mean, they get to spend time with real life friends, but what do I have? I talk to a Tails plushie for god's sake, and don't automatically assume that I can just go social and make friends at school, oh heck no, I'm anti-social, I'm the quiet one, I'm the one who gets hit with the paperballs, called names, pushed over, and any other immature action I can think of. Moving back onto the "online friends" subject, I get the feeling I'm not truely liked, that I'm just used for temporary entertainment, it makes you wonder "Does this person like conversating with me?". If I happen to find out this is a fact with my few online friends, they can kiss my tails goodbye, and I can say hello suicidal.

12:56 am: 4 days and what I did with them..
Hmm..Some good reactants and some bad reactants these past few days..but mostly., b.a.d. Yelling at my parents because I guess I was some how disfuncntioning again (Don't ask) Then my big mouth opened and said some things I really shouldn't have said towards my parents..ouch...then my sister got involved, and she didn't take it too well *sigh*. That left me getting blamed for everything, while I just hid behind my computer playing on my Yamaha keyboard..*double sigh* While I sat there and pondered new ideas..my dad walked in, and got onto me..I suddenly have a serious phobia of him..atleast for the time being. Other bad things that happened this week include, but are not limited to, screwing up Shady's site trying to improve it., obviously that went in the waaaaaaaaaaaaay wrong direction, and got me into a wreck..feeling guilty, and useless. But I tend to feel like that at times...darn mood swings, I don't even know what I'm speaking of as I type this XD. Now for the good stuff., so far Shady likes the new CGI I've created for the boards., or so I think..=3. And I have others still asking me to do sprites., and I have yet another friend asking me to help him with the music for his upcoming fangame..maybe this is too much? My head is going to explode =p And add that to dial-up...BOOM! I really need to backup all this work I am doing though..I have fear of my hard drive going out soon in the future :( And I've only used 41 out of the 115 gb on my hard drive :( *sigh* *transition* I now feel younger people that I am friends with appear to be more mature than I am...well, except for Shady maybe. I'm 16, and I STILL don't have a drivers permit..plus I have a phobia of driving..wonderful. But back onto the "good topic", I think I came across a good friend ;) He's pretty cool and hes skilled with music., and so am I X_X He just suddenly popped up on AIM..reminds me of the time when I met Shady for the first time...he did the same...lol. Another ridiculous topic, I'm supposed to be in school right now lol, that SHOULD be fixed by tommorow, but then again I do not hope it is repaired, I despise ghettoians., and their obnoxious behavior..and rudeness towards me :((. I guess I'll go ahead an end this entry., I hope I do have a bright future in my lifetime.. [end ranting]

---

Something I forgot to mention, I took one of those "disorder" tests, and well, these are my results:

Disorder | Rating
Paranoid: High
Schizoid: High
Schizotypal: Very High
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Very High
Histrionic: High
Narcissistic: Very High
Avoidant: High
Dependent: Very High
Obsessive-Compulsive: High

I admit it..I have problems XD

Now you take the test! http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mv


As I was saying..I'll finally end this entry..

---

This is Q, and my tails are in a knot!! AAAH!!!!!

01:21 am: *sigh* not another one....
Yep, its typical, a mix of good and bad things in Q's bag..and no, its not a walmart bag of which I speak, its what I like to call..a "thought bag". I have been cursed to stay off of the internet because of dialup..ack., while having nothing else to do :( First off..the bad stuff...

1. I'm stuck in nice redneck MS..woohoo..what fun., oh well atleast I'll live in my hometown or nearby i--wait a minute my home town SUCKED!

2. Great, time to get picked on by the "ghettoians" at school once more...the schools here suck badly., oh goodie



and now...some good stuff....

1. Dad claims hes going to get a great job once more..but I can't always rely on him..oh well, I'd rather not think on that subject....anyhow...

2. I customized my pc mouse!! It has a Tails sticker on the inside of it, so now I've..err..my Dad and I have invented the first Tails Pc mouse! We came across doing so as we tried to fix the mouse itself because it liked to freeze A LOT. I never thought the insides of that mouse would have been so filthy after 8 months O_O Either way it didn't matter because soon after the mouse was reassembled, he went out and bought one of those nice 5 button mice XD

3. People needing my help..boy a lot of this has been happening lately! Kad's been requesting that I help with his comics and sprites, kimba asking me to finish her Tikal sprite edits, Midnight asking for help with his upcoming Sonic fangame..suddenly I feel useful! How dare I say I'm useless.. >_<



Let's see now... *counts good and bad things and compares* What the..IMPOSSIBLE!! There are more good things than bad?! I must be dreaming..Yeah, its probably just a dream ^_^" But onto another topic, I don't know how I am going to correct my sleeping pattern in preperation for school, I'd strongly rather not think about school for the time being..all it does is make me tense and uber-nervous..Onto another topic, I got bored tonight and did my first ASC II art pic XD..you guessed it..IT'S TAILS!! I wouldn't consider myself "good"..or Ok in this matter, but yet again not bad or terrible either. (I"ll put up the art later when I'm awake lol, it doesn't appear correctly obviously if I paste it into the entry :( Oh well I suppose after more practice I'll get better *knocks on head* duh!. *Topic transition* Getting more bored by the second, I decided to go old skool and look at the old Sega ads/commercials of the "yestercade", looking at the japanese ones. Then I came across one concerning Mega CD..it had this crazy dude w/ a guitar in it..I thought it was funny but cool at the same time XD. It was the music that interested me the most..a mix of orchestrated strings, techno beat, and guitar riffs = Awesomeness XD. I'm trying to find the full song...but no luck..all I know is that the artist name OR music track name is "Bravo Komatsu". Who knows, I might steal 1 or 2 ideas from the theme to use in my music for Midnight's fangame in the future muahahahahaha!! [end manaical laughing]. I guess this is enough journalizing for now eh heh. ^_^"

11:54 am: Waking up to "nervousness"
Waking up around 11:30, I heard my parents were going out to buy school clothes and what-not..that certainly meant I was being forced to go back to the ghetto school..there is no hope now..I AM SCREWED. All I can hope for now is that my dad gets good news about a job opening of some sort in Charleston, SC. Tommorow shall suck for me, uber badly, or it shall kick a**. One or the other. I'll bet all this stress has caused me to miss out on dreaming, I have not had a good dream in WEEKS. But I woke up to IM one of my friends this morning, luckily someone's in the same boat I am, but I tried to cheer her up, and it slightly worked ^.^" Same goes for another friend, which he has to put up with chaos all week. I'm hoping the best for him.

01:30 am: Happy yet Sad?
In reference to my jealousy of my friends html/css know how, I actually helped him somewhat on his site!

http://mysticruins.freesuperhost.com/index.html

That is what I am happy about for the time being, the sad thing, however, is that I'm going to be forced to go back to the ghetto school I swore to everyone I wasn't going back to, I'm the one who gets made fun of..yeah, you know. And I'm going to drive my parents nuts!!! I'm sick of having to be crammed up with stupid rednecked jerks who care about nothing except their closeminded selves! It has me highly disgusted. Heck, even a teacher made fun of me, thats just plain wrong..and somewhat creepy o.O All I can do is hope and pray that I won't have to go back... :'( Until then, all I can do is rely on Shady and the others to keep me cheered up v.v As I type this, he's asking me to help him out more on the site, wee!! ^_^ *self esteem level rises*

12:14 pm: Ugh, tiredness and chores possibly...
Got up around 11 am to find out Dad was within the vicinity *sigh*, he wakes me up complaining about the cursed mouse malfunctioning, I unplugged and replugged the sucker nearly 5 times, still didn't work, thus, I was forced to do a reboot *sigh*. Now he says if I help him paint around the house, he'll buy me another mouse, but wait, he's using me as an advantage, he kinda wants it for himself, just like those boring games he so-called bought me, eh heh. I'm not so sure if I agree to this idea, I can use my computer just as well as I can without a mouse, heck, its good practice actually for keyboard shortcuts! =p Well, 'nuff about that, I'm starving my self =3 Oddly enough, no yelling from you-know-who this morning. o.O Something smells, and its toxic.

02:43 am: lalalala more suckyness
Staying up later than I should, and getting up earlier than I should = not a good combination. As I was kinda expecting, I argued with Shady once or twice...I so need to get over my weak emotions, any little joke seems to threaten me, and I think its become an embarrasment. And now its leading to me being accused of such things I never do. Right now, I'm sleepier than the fat kid you see in school sleeping on his desk with a baby ruth poking out of his mouth. I've never been able to stay mad at someone for more than a week, if that. The longest I've ever stayed mad at shady was probably only a few hours. See? I told you I can't hold it in, if I do..I'll have an outrage soon after, and it won't be pretty, I promise you that. Same goes for anyone else, I can't stay mad at them forever, but isn't it human nature to do so? Humiliation is still something I have no experience with, being that I have experienced it, that usually appears right after I'm hotheaded. Kinda reminds me of something else, my inability to understand when someone is joking or not. My friend's mentioned I am nieve, and, well, I do believe that o.o

01:59 pm: Good morning turns into bad afternoon :((
Just found out that now my Dad is forcing me to leave..with him...to who knows where... *sigh* and all I know is that he's going to fill my bucket with more. I've packed up some of my belongings, but I do not want to leave, so I haven't packed up everything, I JUST DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO >_< God help me.. :'(

11:09 am: Feeling much better ^_^
Got up around 9:30 this morning, which is very abnormal for me, nonetheless, its a good thing...I think? o.O Oh well, anyways, I woke up to hear yelling (as usual), if your friends with me, you know who I'm talking about XD Not to sound demonic or anything, but I found it actually quite comical ^_^ I find my cousin highly annoying though, he's even stunned I got up so early o_O Only bad thing today that's really happened was, well, I decided to leave my computer on all night downloading and what not, and I found it frozen this morning, which really had me p0ed. Oh well, My obsession with Miles "Tails" Prower tends to make me forget about the bad things in life somewhat =p

06:18 pm: Stress = Mondo Headaches
Today was typical, just the fact that there was a headache, nothing more than normal (Uhh did I word that correctly?). I feel as if I am not heard sometimes, I'm uber shy and anti-social, but my mind is screaming for attention, and I don't know what to do :( Now I'm burning up all over, yet I try to turn on something as a ceiling fan and such, and I get chill bumps all over, hmm, what does that tell you? >_< And it triggers my anger which is sadly, taken out on my good friends -_-. It's like that sudden moment I outrage, I have absolutely no control of myself for that time being. And this headache is just making me feel worse and worse all over :(

01:15 am: Uhh first time
Yep, another usual day for me, bullied by my younger sister for tieing up the phoneline, AS IF I had nothing better to do, heh. My good friend Shady has always been there for me though, as if he was a godsend of somesort :) It was that one day he popped up out of nowhere in AIM, had no clue who he was, but I knew for a fact we shared one interest...OUR OBSESSION WITH MILES "TAILS" PROWER!!!! Despite the times I get jealous of his HTML/CSS know how, I try not to let that bother me, being that I already know a bunch of technical stuff to begin with XD. Let's see, Shady's a good artist, a very good html/css programmer, a good Tails "im-kitsunator", and a good friend!!!!!! I dread the day him and I deadly make conflict with eachother, I find it hard to imagine, but its possible, nonetheless..I simply cannot stay mad at him, its much too hard..and well, I get supersad when we do fight :'( Oh well, enough about that, 'cause we had fun today!!!!!